Wednesday, November 08, 2006


WW: Bigger Picture

I know, I know! I'm lagging behind!

First thing's first - last week's weigh in showed that I had gained 3.2 lbs. I didn't freak out because my cycle had just started and I was ultra bloated. I literally had to roll out of bed and my fat/skinny jeans (which are quickly becoming my fat/fat jeans) were a bit snug. That's how bloated I was, Violet Beauregarde bloated!

I've had as much as a gain of 5 lbs during my cycle so I wasn't concerned with last week's gain as it's usually gone the following week.

Stepped on the scale this monday and my weight had only gone down one pound! *sobs* Certainly there is the possibility that it's just muscle as I've kept up my end of the bargain with the diet and exercise.

I know I shouldn't let it get to me but it does! I had a good cry about it yesterday - this has really been a year full of frustration for me. Again because I spend far too much time focusing on the numbers and not the bigger picture.

I know that it's the journey that's been paved for me and I'm a better person because of it but there are times were I just want to quit!

Not that I would as I've got so much to gain by continuing on this path. But the feeling comes around every now and then - more this year than last.

That being said - I think it may be time to retire my fat/skinny jeans and buy a smaller pair. Just one pair so as not to get TOO comfortable in that size. I purposely haven't gone shopping for new clothes and in all honesty am unsure of what size I'm at currently - I mean, I have an approximation of the size I'm at but am not positive about it.

My sister's coming into town for Thanksgiving and I mentioned while she's here we'd look. I hate shopping for clothes - being a life long fatty, it's such a painful chore to shop for clothes. I have many memories of breaking down in fitting rooms because I was too big for anything cute.

*sobs* I may just chicken out and stick with my fat/skinny jeans - I'll just get a belt and over time I can hold them up with suspenders! That way I'll never have to shop for jeans again!


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